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<p align="center"><b><font face="Verdana" color="#000080" size="2">
<a name="Sexless in the City">Sexless in the City</a></font></b></p>
<p style="margin-left: 20; margin-right: 20"><font face="Verdana"><font size="2">I decided I was going to give Internet dating a try so I signed up for a
three month membership with Matchmaker. If you haven't read the other stories
you will want to start with Date # 1 first so you can understand
the context of future date notes... Here are my stories.
<a title="Email Eileen" href="mailto:eileen@30somethingboston.com?subject=Sexless in the City">email Eileen</a> </font> <b><i>
<font size="2" color="#FF0000">** All names have been changed to protect the not
so innocent.</font></i></b></font></p>
<p align="center"><font face="Verdana" size="2"><b><font color="#FF0000">
<a href="#Date1_Dave">Date 1</a></font></b> | <b><font color="#FF0000">
<a href="#Date2_Steve">Date 2</a></font></b> | <font color="#FF0000"><b>
<a href="#Date3_Cliff">Date 3</a></b></font> |<b><a href="#Date4_Dick"> Date 4</a></b> |
<b><a href="#Date5_Tom">Date 5</a></b> | <b><a href="#Date 6_Darryl">Date 6</a></b> |
Date 7 | Date 8 | Date 9 | Date 10</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana"><b>
<font size="2" color="#FF0000"><a name="Date1_Dave">Date 1 - Dave</a> 38 </font></b></font>
<font face="Verdana" size="2"><b><font color="#FF0000">
Never Married</font></b></font><font face="Verdana"><font size="2">:</font><font size="2" color="#FF0000"><b> </b>
</font><font size="2">Dave was from Chicago and was interested in meeting new
people and since it was my first internet date, out of shear paranoia I asked a friend,
Nancy, to come along.
We met down town and saw a movie at the IMAX theatre. Nothing terribly
exciting happened until my friend that I brought with me got drunk and started
hitting on my date.
</font>
</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana"><font size="2">I mean sloppy groping "I love you" kind of drunk hitting on
him. It wasn't so bad because it was so damn hilarious. He and I were sort of
laughing about it. The only bad part of the 'date' was the friend I brought
proceeded to puke all over the taxi
cab floor and Dave's feet... He and I are still friends, she on the other
hand moved out of state shortly there after and I haven't heard from her since. <br>
</font>
<i><font size="2"><a href="#Sexless in the City">[top of page]</a></font></i></font></p>
<hr color="#000080" width="40%" size="1">
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2"><font color="#FF0000">
<b>
<a name="Date2_Steve">Date 2 - Steve</a> 36 Never Married</b></font>: Well this is an
interesting story because it was my first really big "faux pas" online.
One of the men I was chatting with called me and we had this really GREAT phone
conversation. About 20 minutes later I got an email asking to go out to dinner.
I immediately agreed. He was really nice and had a cute photo with a cute dog
(ha!). So we agreed to meet in
New Hampshire about a 45 minute drive for me, that Sunday night. On Thursday, he
and I were on IM and I said "Are we still on for Sunday night" he replied with
"What date?". After a few minutes of discussion we realized I had made a date
with some<i><font color="#000080"><b> OTHER guy that I had never even spoken too</b></font></i>!
</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">I couldn't exactly explain to guy #2 that I
thought he was guy#1. I mean he had a nice photo he sounded OK, once I
actually chatted with him that is. I wasn't exactly thrilled about driving up to NH but
hey for romance why not? So, I set off to meet him. This is where Internet
dating "faux pas" numero dos occurred... hell it wasn't even a
"faux pas" it was just a stupid "what the hell was she thinking!" thing. I get
up to "Characters" a club right off 93 and I am waiting for him and he pulls up
and we get out of our cars, now here is where the "sort of" bad part happens. We walk up
to the club and although there were a few cars in the parking lot it was closed.
Not a soul around. It didn't even dawn on me until later that I was standing in
the enclosed walkway to a closed nightclub with no one around with a complete
stranger. Which is as bad as diving into a pond not knowing how deep the
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<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">As luck would have it nothing happened although
he suggested that we go to this other place across the highway. We went
there and had a skunked beer and the entire time<b><font color="#FF0000"> </font>
<i><font color="#000080">I was wondering when his
personality was going to show up</font></i></b><i><font color="#000080">.</font></i> It didn't. The conversation was drab and it
really felt like I was there for hours when in fact it was maybe a little
over an hour. At one point I told him a story about me hanging out with some
gay friends at a club called Buzz in Boston and he sort of freaked about it.
This just after he told me he likes NH because it keeps out the riffraff...
</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Here
I am on a date with a snobby, homophobic , 5 foot 5 man (I'm 5'8"), drinking a smelly
beer, almost an hour from home. I have to ask myself, why? Anyhow, I
ended it when the waiter came over to offer us another one of their
scrumptiously skunked beers. I declined and said I had to be going...
</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">As we walked outside I pointed out the moon was waxing and he replied with "Oh a full moon all the freaks will be out tonight" I
was going to point out it wasn't actually full, it was waxing, but decided to let him have his
full moon I had had enough of freaks that night.<br>
<br>
As I walked to my car I gave him a hug and said good bye and he mentioned
something about hanging out in Boston with me and my friends sometime and I
said, sure I mean I only know about 300 single women so why not. Then!!! here is
the "Friends" deal breaker folks then he says "You don't hang out with those gay guys anymore do
you?"</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Did I mention the photo he had up online wasn't even him! </font></p>
<p><i><font face="Verdana" size="2">... only eight more of these "dates" to go!
</font></i></p>
<p><font face="Verdana">
<i><font size="2"><a href="#Sexless in the City">[top of page]</a></font></i></font></p>
<hr color="#000080" width="40%" size="1">
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2"><font color="#FF0000">
<b>
<a name="Date3_Cliff">Date 3 - Fred</a> 38 Divorced No Kids:</b></font> Well I have to admit of
the dozens and dozens of men I have emailed with on MM he was the one I wanted
to truly meet, even
as friends he seemed really cool... Entrepreneur, witty, somewhat
attractive, 38, tall, and he seemed like and all around nice guy.
<font color="#000080"><b><i>I just don't get it...</i></b></font></font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">It started off last week, we had breakfast plans
to meet at Andy's in Cambridge for omelets. Well... he didn't show up. He IM'd
me later in the day to tell me he had something come up and he gotten stuck in New
Hampshire on Business.<i> Right, because they have no phones or cell coverage in
New Hampshire.</i></font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Then last Thursday night we were trying to make
plans to meet and we agreed to meet on Tuesday for breakfast as he teaches at
night which is why he has this breakfast thing, or it could be an obsession with
eggs, who know with these men on Matchmaker. So, we were going to try it again
for Tuesday. <i>(Although I have to admit I didn't tell him I had actually
stopped in to Andy's the previous Tuesday... I let him think I hadn't gone
either.)</i>. While we are on telephone he asks me how much I weight, doh!,
I skirt the number but make it very very clear to him that I am no petite
flower. He audibly changes tone, we were on the phone after all, he becomes
..umm.. how can I say this a little distant? Can't explain it but his demeanor
changes. So I figure ok he's looking for Kate Moss and I am no Kate Moss...
<i>hell, I'm no Kate Winslet!</i></font></p>
<p><font size="2" face="Verdana">I hear from him Sunday night and he says let's
meet Tuesday. So I do not hear word one from him and assume,
rightfully and learned so that he wasn't going to make it (or that I am getting
blown off again). Then this morning I get up just after 9am and he IM's me to say<b><i><font color="#000080">
"hey are we going to meet?"</font></i></b> I tell him I am busy, I have two events coming up,
designing two sites, I have to fire an employee today ..etc. And I have to drive
to Swampscott to pick up some software. </font></p>
<p><font size="2" face="Verdana">He says he wants to drive up with me.
So, I <u><b>let him</b></u> talk me into picking him up. I get there and
he seems really nice. So I am giving him a hard time joking around to see if he can
keep up with me and he's rolling with the punches
which is totally cool.
<b><i>(Side note: He picks on the cleanliness of my car. I still have a big
cooler in it from the weekend ... give me a break)</i></b>. As we are half way up the road he tells me he forgot his cell phone so
<b>I go back and he gets it</b>. We then head off
again. Nothing major happened we listened to
the ball game, I was nervous and chatted too much at the start
but then just stopped talking altogether. </font></p>
<p><font size="2" face="Verdana">When I got out of the car to get the
software I was cursing myself for having parked in the drive way so I wouldn't have
to walk IN FRONT of the car. Doh! </font></p>
<p><font size="2" face="Verdana">On our way up he mentioned something about
eating and I said are you hungry and he said yes than changed his mind<font color="#000080">
<i><b>three times.. yes... no... yes... no..</b></i></font>.yes. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana"><font size="2">On the way back from Swampscott he wanted to go get
something to eat than changed his mind AGAIN! I said do you want me to
stop in Dunkin Donuts in Revere. Which I did, he got a bagel and a Coolata. All the while
during this indecision he is telling me what he finds wrong with women, male
female relationships... he tells me he is looking for someone to stay home and have babies
for him. </font> </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana"><font size="2">He then decides he would like to have dinner with me, although I
hadn't eaten yet I was feeling kind of like I just needed to get him home before
he said something else to make me feel unworthy of his precious attention. So we are driving and his
two-way goes off and he is chatting with a friend who is gong on about all of
Fred's hot chicks... nice... but it gets even better. <font color="#FF0000"><i><b>HE
Two-Ways HIS FRIEND back and starts asking him about "The hot Brazilian girl who
was at the cookout!", </b></i></font>hey </font> <b>
<font size="2" color="#000080">we
are</font></b><font size="2"> on somewhat of a first date, it might not have been dinner and a film but this is
our first meeting and he is chatting on the two-way speaker about some sexy young Brazilian
girl!! Ok - ok, So I get the point you aren't lusting
after me but for THE LOVE OF GOD put down the damn phone, I'm already feeling
like whale after he spent an hour trying to guess my weight... "Well you appear
to carry it in your chest but you have hips too, are you 175? 185, no...
no...more? ... less?" ... "I'll take a better look when you get out of the
car"... I'm thinking couldn't an 18-wheeler just drive into my car and kill us
both? Then he tells me that the Brazilian girl was nothing he just though she
was hot. But I'm already feeling hostile towards him for being such an
egotistical jackass.</font></font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">I finally get him home with the remnants of my
ego slightly still attached and drop him off. He smiled and said thanks I had
fun and jumped out. Hey, at this point I was just happy he didn't go screaming
mad into the house. I was also happy he was out of my car.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">So, I get home and I realize he has left his
eye glasses in my car. Dear reader, I know what is going through your head.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">He did it
on purpose? <b>Not even close!</b> So I see him on IM as I am
calling him and he doesn't answer his phone and he shuts off IM. So I leave him
a voice mail message and say "Hello, <i><font color="#000080"><b>I am NOT stalking you</b></font></i>
, you left your eye glasses in my car. And since you are blind without them I
thought you might like them back.". A minute later he IM's me , "Hey ahhh you are
nice, I mean REALLY nice but there is no chemistry" .. I type;<b>
<font color="#FF0000"><i>'Yes , hello, YOU left your glasses in my car! Not the
other way around!"</i></font></b> ... Dumb ass. I didn't want him to know where I
lived so I ended up driving his eye glasses the 30 minutes back to his
house." </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">I wish I had just told him to come over because
the next part wouldn't have happened... <font color="#000080"><b>I am not even remotely
joking ...</b></font> I get back home, feeling like crap, and why?, cause some
asshole treated me badly. Come on get with the program who cares he was an
jerk.... And the phone rings and it's HIM again! He says 'Eileen, I left my car
keys in your car" ... at this point if I wasn't <b><i>completely certain of his
horrification</i></b> with meeting me I would think he was just trying to get me over
there. But in reality he was just an idiot. So!!!.... I drive all the way back to
house - YES AGAIN! And drop off his keys. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">I pull up to his house and it is raining so hard
I can barely see out my windshield with wipers flying and he comes over and grabs the keys saying,
well more like yelling that his windows
were left open like it's my fault he has an sixty thousand dollar car with
power windows and one set of keys. And he runs off. Ok, I buy that his very expensive brand new
Continental has it's windows open and it's raining like a son-of-a-bitch and he
is in a rush. So, I wait while he rolls them up, I wait an extra minute and
realize he is not getting out <i><font color="#FF0000"><b>to thank me </b>
</font></i>for driving back to his house <font color="#FF0000"><b>FOUR times</b></font> today to pick his ass up, get his
cell
phone, drop off his eye glasses and again his keys. It's not like I don't have a
job to do. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">As I am backing up to leave he is still sitting in his car. So, I
turn around and go home as I am driving away he gets out of his his car and goes
into the house. Eight hours... yes dear reader ... EIGHT HOURS later he emails me
to say "Thanks for coming back here today".... <i>
<font color="#FF0000"><b>"When you get the
braces off and lose some weight look me up I'd like to see you again."</b></font></i></font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">ahhhh, no.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana">
<i><font size="2"><a href="#Sexless in the City">[top of page]</a></font></i></font></p>
<hr color="#000080" width="40%" size="1">
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2"><font color="#FF0000">
<b>
<a name="Date4_Dick">Date 4</a> - Dick 34 Never Married</b></font>:
I join Match.com to my chagrin as my 2005 new
years goal is to go on one date a week for the year until I meet a match and it
has to start somewhere. And boy, could I be any worse at picking the men to
converse with online! </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Within minutes of joining I already have one
email. Yes it should have been a premonition of his desperation but like I said
I had to start somewhere and I had promised my family and friends to lower my
standards for a date. Yes - yes folks I have lowered ... errr... I mean ...
adjusted my standards on dating the opposite gender... I <b>WILL</b> go on dates
with men that are not Irish or of Irish descent... I <b>WILL</b> let it go if
they are missing teeth or don't floss, I <b>WILL</b> not be a stickler for an IQ over
70. I <b>KNOW</b> it seems so unlike me. But I am <i>trrrrying</i>.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">So, this guy seems to be on the right path. 34,
lives in Cambridge, works at Alkermes, has an OK pic, he is of Hispanic descent
having moved here from New Mexico three years ago. We chat on the phone a couple
of times and I am already feeling like this is not going to go anywhere cause he
seems a bit like Steve, AKA: <a href="#Date2_Steve">Mr. No Personality</a> (see date Two) . But I promised myself that I
would give a guy one date if they don't come off being an ax murderer. So we
make plans to meet at an Irish Restaurant in Central Sq.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">When I arrive he is standing outside and as I am
walking over the first thing I notice, aside from the fact that he didn't come
over to greet me was the fact that he had no neck. I mean for real no neck. Like
it was broken and someone removed the vertebrae and fused the whole area
together. But who cares right, I'm <i>trrrrying ... remember</i>? </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">I walk up to him and say hello and he says hello.
We are just standing there like idiots. I recently read a book called "Mars and
Venus on a date" so I am trying to let him take the lead as it says in the
book. And here it is folks the number one reason I can't find someone... it is the
inability to find a guy who wants to take the reins and make a simple decision
like "Let's go inside" or how about "Would you like to grab dinner?". So I say
"Let's go inside". Then being the astute gentleman that he is he walks ahead of
me opens the door and walks in. No he did not pause to hold the door, no he did
not think I was right behind him. He just walked in and the door partially shut
in my face. Well I am thinking to myself do I bail now or do I suck it up. Am I
a horrible person or worse yet a racist for thinking that maybe because his family
comes from Mexico that they have different customs or no chivalry? So we sit down and for the next three hours he talked to my
boobs about himself. And when he wasn't giving my breasts a running commentary
on his life he was ogling the waitresses ass. I am not kidding at one point
she turned to go get something and I swear if I hadn't been there he </font><!--[if gte vml 1]><v:shape
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<td align="center"><b><font face="Verdana" size="2">I could give a crap what
you do now but have a little ambition in your life...</font></b></td>
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src="dating_files/image002.gif" align=left v:shapes="_x0000_s1046"><![endif]><font face="Verdana" size="2">would have
reached out and grabbed a hunka-hunka of the girls good lovin'. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Least at this point I forget to mention a number
of the gems he shared with me about his life. Let's start with LACK OF AMBITION;
he tells me he works at big Bio Company in Cambridge. Based on his profile I am assuming, incorrectly, that he works
in the labs or the offices, maybe sales. But no he tells me that he packages the
stuff in the warehouse part time. I'm thinking, 34 living with roommates, no money saved
because yes like every date I have been on they have no goals with no mental
handle on the fact that sometimes you actually save your money and not
expect a women to pay your way... grrrr. I figure he MUST be in school, or he MUST have a dream or a goal in life that he is
focused on or maybe an artist a musician , which are all OK in my book... and that this is a job until he gets there. So I ask and he replies
with "No, I like it there" , "No I really don't' have my eyes set on anything
else" .. yeah right buddy except my boobs and the waitresses ass you mean.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Geesh, I am thinking to myself ... I'm 30
something myself
and I need a guy who at least WANTS to do something with his life. I could
give a crap what you do now but have a little ambition in your life. Do you
dream of a house, Do you want to rock climb, run a marathon ...something
ANYTHING ! That's when he breaks into the story about his housemates...</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">The first of the two stand out stories, because
there were plenty of them. Starts with him saying "My housemate is a bit of a
nut". Sometimes he likes to go up on the roof and throw grocery carriages off of it. And no one has even caught him. And this one time he did it
and it <b><font color="#FF0000">landed on a new BMW</font></b>. Isn't' that awesome!" .... no Dick, no that is NOT
awesome. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">He then tells me that he lives with four guys.
And maybe a year ago or so they all get drunk. And while roomie number two is
passed out on the couch roomies 3 and 4 decided it would be really funny to
strip him and... hmmm.. how shall I put this for my delicate reader. They
decided to molest him with a bong. <i>For those of you who never had a misspent
youth a bong is a long glass or plastic tube which water sits at the bottom of
that cools the smoke from hot dope as you breath it in.</i> They take the tube and
place it on his... male member... a-hem... roomie number 2 wakes up in the
middle of all this revelry and punches roomie number 3 in the face. Then Dick says
"isn't that hysterical... every once in a while we watch the video it's so
funny".</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Ahhhh, NO it's not funny and did you say video? So I
point out to my dear date Dick that his friends have basically molested, in fact
same may consider it rape of their roommate and that they still have the incriminating
video of the incident. Was he out of his mind participating in such a thing?
Dick
changes his story pretty quickly and says he wasn't there. <i>Riiiight</i>.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">That was my queue to leave. I said I was getting
tired and asked the waitress for the check. He says it's only 8pm and I am
thinking two hours I have lost from my life on this nut case. So the check
comes. He gets visibly nervous, and I pull out my wallet at which point it's
partially open and he reaches over and takes a $20 out of it. YES I AM NOT KIDDING
<font color="#0000FF"><b>he takes a $20 out of my wallet </b></font>and I hadn't even gotten it all the way open.
Ugh. I am the homing beacon for freaks.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">He puts his ATM/ Debit card down and pays, and
yes he did stiff her on the tip. I mean she should have gotten at least
20% for his grotesque staring. Hell he should have tipped me for having to put
up with him for three hours! I get up to leave and he was visibly
undressing me the whole time I stood up. ick. When we get outside he must have
asked me 10 times to get a drink with him. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Oh I forgot to mention I had ordered
a Guinness before dinner and through the whole meal keeps asking me why I wasn't
drinking more. Geesh I don't know Dick maybe because Alcohol wouldn't help me at
this point that the onl</font><font face="Verdana" size="2">y thing that could
save me was a frontal lobotomy and that wasn't on the menu. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">We go outside and he is barraging me with joining him out some
place and I am like, Ummm <b>NO</b>. At this point he is standing there staring
at me and I go to give him a hug and he goes in for a mouth lock. YUCK...
he gets a head full of hair instead. THEN HERE IS THE CINCHER, THE CLOSING
ARGUMENT... the ... cherry on the nightmare known as my single dating life. He
grabs the girls as I am pulling away. Yes that's right both of them like they
were cantaloupes being tested for freshness. Not usually at a loss for words I
step back undecided on if I should deck him or start laughing at the
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<tr>
<td align="center"><b><font face="Verdana" size="2" color="#FF0000">"...We
really had something happening."</font></b></td>
</tr>
</table>
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src="dating_files/image003.gif" align=right v:shapes="_x0000_s1062"><![endif]><font face="Verdana" size="2">he
entire action...damn, the entire evening! </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">I walk away to my jeep and get in and somewhat
shocked but nonetheless chal</font><font face="Verdana" size="2">king it up to
"one more frog".</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Over the next week he calls me repeate</font><font face="Verdana" size="2">dly. In
fact 11 times in one evening. Thank God for caller ID.</font><font face="Verdana" size="2">
So I was forced to write him an email saying that there was no chemistry. To
this he flips out with "What do you mean, I felt it. We really had something
happening. Did you meet someone else? Who is it? Send me his photo? Send me his
profile! Was it on Match Maker?" ...</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">I ended up having to block him from contacting
me again and changed my cell phone number.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">God help me.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana">
<i><font size="2"><a href="#Sexless in the City">[top of page]</a></font></i></font></p>
<hr color="#000080" width="40%" size="1">
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2"><font color="#FF0000">
<b>
<a name="Date5_Tom">Date 5</a> - Tom 35 Never Married</b></font>: Tom was persistent I have
to give him that. He did not take no for an answer. And after much back and
forth I gave in to a date with him. I got there a little early and I must have
walked out to my car five times to leave before he showed up late. And that's
when the fun began.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">I am waiting in the foyer area of Bertucchi's in
Waltham
when he arrives. As he is walking across the lot I am thinking not bad at least
he has a neck let's hope he has a personality and wow wouldn't it be perfect if
he has ambition too ! Oh boy, a personality and ambition were the
least of my concerns as I was about to find out.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">He walks into the foyer and I say "Tom" and
he walks over and stands about 4 inches from my face and is looking me up and
down and saying under his breath "Lovely, just lovely". I can't explain it clear
enough but if you have ever had a moment where you were sure that you were in a
warped dream or an episode of the twilight zone then you know how I felt. I
wasn't sure if I should show him my teeth it was was like being an animal at
auction.
SO I stick out my hand say "Hi, I'm Eileen" , he looks at my hand as if it were
an octopus tentacles and he looks at me with horror and then declares, I mean
LOUDLY declares "I'M A HUGGER" at which point he puts me in a bear hug. Come on
folks, we all know I am not miss touchy feelie with TOTAL STRANGERS and normally
I comfortable giving into such
displays of affection but this guy was on me like a wet pair of jeans and it lasted way too long to be comfortable for me. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">We walk into the restaurant and I see that he is
holding a copy of "Think like a CEO" which he later tells me looks so bad
because he brought it to the beach all summer and it fell in the ocean a few
times. Ya huh, ok. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Most of the meal was spent listening to his
stories about being an inventor, or showing me schematics of the stuff he
invents. I'm not kidding he pulls out battered pieces of laminated paper
from his pockets with his designs on it. Think mad professor that wants to be a
CEO. He spends a great deal of time telling me he has no money and that every
dime he gets he puts into his inventions. And how he has pieces of cars all over
the hous</font><font face="Verdana" size="2">e
because he picked them up at the junk yard 'cause he likes the plastic
polymer and he is going to come up with something brilliant one of these days to
use it for. I can only imagine what his house looks like. I saw the inside of
his car later on and had to ask him if he lived in his car?</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">At one point he jumps up and says he has to use
the bathroom. Before he leaves he bends over and pulls up his pants legs and
shows me his socks. Red wit</font><!--[if gte vml 1]><v:shapetype
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<td align="center"><b><font face="Verdana" size="2">... I hope to God he
washes his hands in the bathroom.</font></b></td>
</tr>
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</v:shape><![endif]--><![if !vml]><img border=0 width=216 height=135
src="dating_files/image004.gif" align=left v:shapes="_x0000_s1066"><![endif]><font face="Verdana" size="2">h
little yellow stars on then. OK, 35 wearing colored socks but hey I had socks
with flowers on them. But, these were not ordinary socks per </font>
<font face="Verdana" size="2">Tom. These are bike socks, To which he is putting
his hand on his foot down his shoe and all I can think of I hope to God he
washes his hands in the bathro</font><font face="Verdana" size="2">om. And he
goes on VERY LOUDLY that these socks cost $4.00 and that normally they would be
$17 or $18 bucks but wasn't he thrifty for buying them online and saving all
that money. I agree and he starts to sit back down but I reminded him he got up
to use the rest room and he takes off.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">As he is returning to the table I look over and
he starts to run. Not just run like a jog but a full out run like a child on
speed. Imagine a full grown man in a suit, running through a relatively nice
restaurant at full speed but his arms and his legs are flailing out to the sides
like one of those old ladies you see walking at dusk ... did I mention full
speed... I couldn't help but laugh and <font color="#0000FF"><b>pray to Jesus Christ no one from work was
in the restaurant.</b></font> The second time he did it I had to look away. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Conversation went quickly mostly because I
was entertained by him acting like he was on speed dashed with LSD. Along
with his imagination he must have
an over active bladder because he got up at least 6 times to hit the restroom
and ran back after every trip!</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">He also spent a great deal of time trying to
convince me why we were perfect for each other and how great would our kids be
and didn't I agree.... kids? ... <b>ahhh, no.</b></font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">And again like my darling date
<a href="#Date4_Dick">Dick #4</a>, the check comes and he gets all
nervous. <b>WHAT IS UP WITH THAT? </b>He asked me to dinner. Here is a guy who is a sales
rep for SAP! Makes as much maybe more than me and what? Do all men think women
want free meals from them? Believe me I pay my own way in this life. I was in
the process of getting out my wallet and he is all big eyed and he starts
repeatedly saying "I am going to blow it right now, aren't I?"... I say "No
you aren't going to blow anything I pay my own way... so really it's no big
deal". And it wasn't, but then he drives the point home. He looks at
me and says "I really blew it didn't I?"... <he sighs>... "I really don't have any
money I'm pretty broke so I am going to use a credit card do you want me to pay
for your meal?" ... Ummm, no. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Am I wrong here in thinking that if you aren't
going to do it don't freaking do it. Don't analyze it with your first time date
OUT LOUD.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">It didn't end there. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">We went outside to which he <i> <b>insisted</b></i> I come to
his car to see his best invention. Which I did, then this young girl comes walking
over she is having trouble with her car and could she use a cell phone.
Meanwhile I am rummaging about looking for my phone while Tom is cluelessly
holding his and he starts talking to her in this ramble about cars and car sounds
and God only knows what and she gets freaked and nearly runs away from us. Now
he really REALLY didn't get the fact that she didn't want to talk to him about
cars. That she just wanted to call her Dad and find out where he was.
Thankfully for her he pulled in as she was calling him on my phone. Out of
everything this was the deal breaker. I mean he really didn't realize she didn't want to talk to him. That would drive me nuts.
You have to know when to shut up.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">So, I say am freezing and I have to go. After
all
it was snowing and raining and I had an umbrella but he was trying to get all
cozy with me under it and it was creeping me out. <i>"What if he didn't wash his
hands?"</i></font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">I say I am leaving and he asks for a hug, THREE
big old goopy bear hugs later I start to walk away... "Oh Eileen, Can I have
your cell phone number?".. Doh! I had given my phone to the girl so I couldn't
say I didn't have one... I had to give him my number he was nice just a little
out there so I didn't want to be mean... I gave him my number and he called me
while I was standing there "just to test that he put it in his phone OK". Then I am walking
away again... " Eileen, just one more hug. I like hugging you , you're a good
hugger!" ... oh God... TWO more hugs later I was in my car wondering how I
had gotten this far without sticking a fork in my left eye.</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">He's called me every night this week ... a
friend of mine thinks he
was just nervous...</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">Personally, I wonder; "What if he didn't wash his hands?"</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana">
<i><font size="2"><a href="#Sexless in the City">[top of page]</a></font></i></font></p>
<hr color="#000080" width="40%" size="1">
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2"><font color="#FF0000">
<b><a name="Date 6_Darryl">Date 6</a> - Darryl 29, Never Married</b></font>:
[HONORABLE MENTION] Although I have not met Darryl I felt this email from him
was worth a mention. First the background data. I was on Craig's list about 8 or
9 months ago looking for furniture and responded to his add selling a futon.
When I was on the phone with him he mentioned he had seen me on MatchMatcher.com
and would i like to meet him. Turns out that he clicked on my email link in
yahoo which had my picture from when I had tried Yahoo dating last year.
Believable. Well I never did meet him and I never did buy the futon. About 8 or
some months go by and I send him an email of some photos I had emailed to my
"buddies list" not entirely looking to see who the email goes to. This is his
response as written my comments are in red:</font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2">(sic)</font></p>
<p><tt><font face="Verdana" size="2">so, how goes the boyfriend search?<br>
<br>
hopefully well.<br>
<br>
me? still single.<br>
<br>
someday i'll meet the right girl...<br>
<br>
had this one gal lead-me-on a couple of weeks ago. we were chatting away nicely,
then phone, then trying to schedule initial get-together... shes total type-a,
wicked busy, but seemed pretty chill too. kind of like me. then, she just up and
disappeared. no replies, no call backs... funny too, cuz that was a pet peave we
had in common (being left hanging). anyway, i then started thinking she wasn't
fer real(those pics were just too cute to be true, you know?),then i started
thinking it was karmic payback for me having done similar to someone else
recently. thus, i hope you wouldn't characterize my side of our brief
mutual-interest convo as being like what just happened to me. if so, i'm sorry,
i didn't mean to lead you on or leave you hangin </font></tt>
<font face="Tahoma" size="2" color="#FF0000"><tt><font face="Verdana">(WHAT? I
wasn't ever interested in him!) </font></tt></font><tt>
<font face="Verdana" size="2">. if not, phew! (please forgive me for being a
freak,<br>
but then again,that is why "they" call "us" "freaks",isn't it?) thus, just to
clarify, i'm not entirely sure who i am to you, but if for some reason i'm
(still) on your "prospectives list", i probably shouldn't be. the reason i say
this is that since the many-moons-ago when we started chatting, i've had some
learning experiences about who i am to me, and what more i want from life,
etc... as a result, i realize my romantic interest in you way-back-when was
probably motivated more by loneliness than by a genuine sense of genuine<br>
compatability between us </font></tt>
<font face="Verdana" size="2" color="#FF0000">(</font><font face="Tahoma" size="2" color="#FF0000"><tt><font face="Verdana">Is he
telling me he is gay?)</font></tt></font><tt><font face="Verdana" size="2">.
sorry. human. imperfect. anyway, i just wanted to make that clear to you, so
that you would have informed/more-realistic sense of what is going on here. is
that mean to say, or just difficult to say in a non-mean way?<br>
<br>
i felt i should clarify, since i would have appreciated the same from that other
girl. </font></tt><font face="Verdana" size="2" color="#FF0000">(</font><font face="Tahoma" size="2" color="#FF0000"><tt><font face="Verdana">Oh
god, luggage and I've never met this guy.)</font></tt></font><tt><font face="Verdana" size="2"><br>
<br>
karma, right?<br>
<br>
actually, i guess its more like "the golden rule",which was mistranslated from
the original <br>
chinese, btw. </font></tt><font face="Verdana" size="2" color="#FF0000">(</font><font face="Tahoma" size="2" color="#FF0000"><tt><font face="Verdana">Fascinating.
not.)</font></tt></font><tt><font face="Verdana" size="2"><br>
<br>
what whitey thinks it said: "do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
</font></tt><font face="Verdana" size="2" color="#FF0000">(</font><font face="Tahoma" size="2" color="#FF0000"><tt><font face="Verdana">Who's
Whitey? Whitey Bulger the Irish Mafia philosopher?.)</font></tt></font><tt><font face="Verdana" size="2"><br>
<br>
what it actually says: "do NOT do unto anyone what you WOULDN'T want them to<br>
do unto you."<br>
<br>
pretty different meanings, if you stop and think about them...<br>
<br>
okay, shuttingup now. </font></tt><font face="Verdana" size="2" color="#FF0000">(</font><font face="Tahoma" size="2" color="#FF0000"><tt><font face="Verdana">Thank
god.)</font></tt></font><tt><font face="Verdana" size="2"><br>
<br>
peas!(not queues)</font></tt></p>
<p><font face="Verdana" size="2" color="#FF0000">This was written during the
middle of the day. So he wasn't drunk. </font></p>
<p><font face="Verdana">
<i><font size="2"><a href="#Sexless in the City">[top of page]</a></font></i></font></p>
<hr color="#000080" width="40%" size="1">
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